In the last couple of months I found myself reading quite a lot of relationship related books. “He’s just not that into you”, “Act like a lady, think like a man”, ” Why men marry bitches”… even “The Game” have been my main reading for some time. I’ve learnt a lot from all those books and I really look forward to read that kind of books.
The most important lesson I’ve learnt so far is that we are all different from each other, each man is a completely different person from other man. Even though we seem to attract the same kind of man, each relationship has its own pace and characteristics so it’s unrealistic to think that everything you read in every book will apply/help to your love life.
Something very interesting I’ve noticed from all the books and that I really appreciate is that they all tell us women to love ourselves more, to take care of ourselves and our needs and feelings rather than devoting ourselves to nursing men, that even after we are in a relationship. In every single book is said that we women are smart, loving, caring, self-sufficient beings, we are strong and deserve a good man to love us, and make us happy but not to complete us, because we are complete and perfect on our own. I love it when the main goal of the books are enlighten us and making us stronger.
In my own relationships experiences I noticed that I seem to attract very loving, passionate and romantic men, men who’d go out of their way to satisfy my needs, to make romantic date plans, to give me unforgettable experiences. I also realized that based on some hurtful love experiences from my past every time a relationship finishes, I tend to take more time to open up to new relationships, I take time to get to know people, I’m what some like to call “a bitch” when I first start dating men, but somewhere on the path to each relationship I do open up and become a very nice and loving person, and that’s when men usually change completely and become more interested on their own needs, forget about all the loving gestures they used to do and start treating me like they’d treat any other female friend. I know for a fact they still loved me and still cared about me, they’ve always been faithful and honest with me, as far as I know…but the way they express their love changes. By that time I’ve become very attached and needy and I don’t want the good times to finish, so I start acting different and usually drive them away.
So at this point of my life and starting my new year, I don’t have a boyfriend, I do however love my countryside boy and I’m planning on keep reading those books one by one as many times as possible, not to learn to manipulate his feelings or of any other man for what matters, but rather to learn to control my feelings and the way I project my emotions. I want to be the same person I was when he met me, and try to listen to my head more than I listen to my heart.
In some other posts I can tell you all my different love stories and what I’ve learnt from each relationship advices books. I’ll really appreciate all your reading suggestions to keep growing.